Tinder is one of the most popular online dating apps that enable you to connect with like-minded people. It’s a place where millions of swipes take place day after day. With millions of users worldwide and excellent user activity, Tinder can mesmerize you by making you think you are going out on a date 100%. However, the reality may be harsh.
Getting a match on Tinder is just one piece of getting the “date in the real world” puzzle right. Now, you need to have a chat with your match. That’s when the “no-reply” phenomenon takes place.
Tinder’s algorithm has done a perfect job. It matched you with the girl or guy of your dreams, you reached out, and then there was no reply to your message. You look at the chat and see that you could have said something different to start a conversation.
What do you do? You would love to send a second message, but you don’t want to appear as someone pushy or desperate.
We’ve got your back! Before we give you the second message examples you can use after your first message on Kausal or Tinder fails to hit the bullseye, let’s see what you can do if your match ignores your first message.
What to do if your match doesn’t respond to your Tinder message?
If you’ve spent some time on Tinder, you probably know that some matches respond instantly while others never respond to your messages. What’s the catch? The catch is that there is no catch. People on the other side of Tinder live their lives. They still have their hobbies, a job, friends, family, workouts; you name it.
No one is under any obligation to reply to any messages. With that being said, you should wait for a response before doing anything. We are looking at three potential scenarios:
- You can unmatch your Tinder match and forget that anything ever happened;
- You can continue to spam the person, which will probably cause them to unmatch you;
- You can wait for at least three days before sending a second message.
Three days is more than enough time for someone to reply to a message. If you decide to send a second message, you might feel desperate, not knowing what to say so as not to make things worse.
To help you out, we’ve put together a list of second message examples and put them in different categories ranging from compliments to making fun of your first message on Tinder.
1. Compliments work like a charm only when they end with a question
Many people think that they can give a compliment to a Tinder match and get the job done, which couldn’t be further from the truth. Remember, we are talking about online dating. Your Tinder match can’t see your facial expression or hear the tone of your voice. Even if you give the compliment honestly, you may appear like a creep.
Fortunately, there is an easy way to avoid it. You can give a compliment, but the trick is to do it ever so casually while ensuring your message has at least one question. Here are some great lines:
“You look gorgeous in that photo. What’s that in the background?! I recognize that place, love hanging out there as well!”
“Your cat looks so sleepy in that photo! What is its name?”
“Your outfit looks like you’ve stepped down from a catwalk! Don’t tell me you live with a fashion guru?”
“You are smiling in all your photos. You have such a lovely smile! Does it mean that you are a cheerful person?”
These are great second messages that can help you come back from sending an unsuccessful first message. They show that you took interest, looked at their profile pics, and now have a compliment plus a question.
2. Try to make a personal connection
There are many reasons why first messages fail to generate a response. You can never actually know what’s happening on the other side of the app.
That’s why you should not take things personally. Instead, do a bit of research. To inspire interest in your match, you need to try and make a personal connection. You can do that by going back to their photos and profile bios.
Photos and dating bios are gold mines. There are so many details there you can use to write excellent second messages and try to prevent the person from unmatching you. Here are some examples to use as inspiration:
“I missed that we practically live in the same area! How long have you been living here?”
“So, you love cocktails, eh? What a coincidence – I love cocktails too. I’ll tell you my favorite cocktail if you tell me yours!”
“A friend told me many good things about the college you are going to. Would you recommend it to someone like me?”
“I can see that you love to travel a lot. I do too! Out of all the places you’ve visited so far, which one is your favorite?”
These second messages work because they help you show a different side of your personality. Instead of appearing as someone interested only in hooking up, you seem interested in that person. You took the time to read their bios and go through their photos. It means a lot and can help you get a response.
3. Consider making them laugh
Funny openers are the best openers. If you’ve sent an unsuccessful first message, a witty comeback can open some doors for you. Yes, many people on Tinder are looking for serious relationships, but it mainly attracts people from the hookup culture. They want to have fun and be with chill and funny people.
Showing that you know how to crack a joke can do you a favor, especially if it genuinely makes them laugh. Here are some second messages you can use on Kasual or Tinder to inspire you:
“Sorry, can’t write long messages. You are too hot to look at your picture for more than a couple of seconds!”
“It’s OK to ignore my first message. Can’t wait to see when Tinder matches us a second time because we are such a perfect couple.”
“You can’t just summon me and don’t reply. I can still grant you three more wishes.”
“Describe my first message in 3 emojis but be careful – I’m faint-hearted.”
When writing funny second messages on Kasual or Tinder, feel free to experiment. There is nothing you can lose. Lay back and come up with something humorous and original. If you make the other side laugh, you will undoubtedly get a response.
4. Make fun of your first message
You’ve sent a message to your Kasual or Tinder match, and they didn’t respond. So what? There is no need to be hard on yourself. There are two possible outcomes – you will get unmatched or get that response.
If you sent a bad message and see that now, you can turn the tides and openly admit that you messed up. Here are some excellent examples:
“Ouch, it really seems that I put a wall of text between us. How do you suggest we tear it down? ”
“Look at me spamming with emojis like I’m a third-grader. Can you give me one more chance to prove to you that I’m as old as my profile says?”
“I wouldn’t reply to a guy that only talks about himself too! What about replying to a guy that genuinely likes you and feels terribly sorry for that bad first message?”
“I’m sorry, but the kid that stole my phone sent you that cliche message. I got my phone back. Let’s start talking like adults, shall we?”
“Ouch, that message was so cheesy that you can actually drink wine with it! What do you think, can I do better than that?”
Making a joke at your expense sends a strong message about your confidence and interest in making the match work. Remember, you have nothing to lose and everything to gain. So, why not try and turn a disaster into a comedy then?
OK, now that you know a dozen messages you can send to Kasual or Tinder matches after no response, we must do something to keep the history from repeating itself. Here are some things you can do to get a reply on Kasual or Tinder every time and some common Kasual or Tinder messaging pitfalls to avoid.
Top 3 things you can do to get a response on Kasual or Tinder
Your first message after getting a match can backfire for many reasons. Here are the most important steps for improving your chances on Tinder:
- Add more photos to your profile – People love when they can see you in various situations, so be sure to add more pics. You can add shots with your friends or those you took while at work or traveling. Upload at least a couple of photos on your profile, but the more, the merrier.
- Complete your bio – Before responding to your messages on Tinder, your matches will check out your profile and read your bio. If it is empty, you don’t stand any chances. Be sure to write at least a couple of paragraphs and make your bio interesting, original, and attention-grabbing.
- Use a grammar and spelling checker – Grammatical and spelling mistakes can date-block you and get your messages ignored. Fortunately, there are many apps you can use to check grammar and spelling. Enable the autocorrect feature on your phone to ensure all your messages are at least correct.
Top 4 common mistakes to avoid when writing the first message on Tinder
It’s easy to make a mistake when sending a first message on Tinder, especially if you are new to online dating. Getting a notification that you got a match can get you excited and eager to send a message as soon as possible. However, remain calm because here is how most common mistakes happen:
- Yes and no questions – Your first message should open a conversation – not close it. That is why you should always avoid asking a yes or no question. Instead, ask one that demands an answer at least a sentence or two long.
- Overusing emojis – We get it, emojis are fun, but they can communicate that you are insecure, too polite, or lack confidence. When you think that it would be nice to insert an emoji, do yourself a favor and don’t do it.
- Writing an essay instead of messaging – Don’t forget that you are chatting with an actual person. Nobody’s on Tinder to read blog posts. That’s precisely why you should keep your messages short and sweet. If you send walls of text, you will appear dull and probably end up utterly ignored or unmatched.
- Being too cheesy – If you use “cheesy” as a form of humor, you need to be very careful because you never know how someone you’ve never met will react to it. If you want to use it when chatting, be sure to signal to the Tinder community that you like that type of humor. For instance, you can leave something cheesy in your bio.
The second message examples we shared with you can help you grab your match’s attention once again and strike up the conversation. As you can see, you have plenty of different options to choose from, and the examples above are bound to inspire you.
Whether you decide to give a compliment, make a personal connection, or make them laugh, you shouldn’t be pushy because you will only make it worse.
If they ignore you again after the second message, that is a tell-tale sign that that ship, in particular, has sailed. It’s time to unmatch that person (who doesn’t deserve you, anyway) and go back to that ever-exciting game of swiping left and right.